Optimistic Pessimism

After my projects day competition, I did not want to know the result. My flash website could not open and I was not expecting to get into the finals after that experience. My months of hard work would have gone to waste. But wait. The results are not out yet. Do not fret so early. Maybe my powerpoint was good enough to put me through. No. I cannot lapse into delusion.

So frequently we are met with such troubles, that we always put the executioner swords to our necks even before the results are announced. We should always remain optimistic. It is the only way to getting over with things. Why should we unsettle ourselves before even knowing the outcome? I have become a firm believer of waiting and hoping for the best possible result. And then I realised that I would always be wrong. Is there another way other than being over optimistic such that we would be disappointed after knowing the result?

That is why I have adapted this mentality of "optimistic pessimism". It is a mental state by which one calculates the worse possible outcome, prepare oneself for the truth, and may surprise with the result. It is the process where we lower our standards, and maybe get a surprise if the result favours us. People who have "optimistic pessimism" will always have a good balance of reality and hope in their head. They are the one who would be the best to prepare themselves for the truth.

With this attitude, I held my breath when the results were out. I would not be too confident of getting in nor getting out. The result which read was "Finals". I was overjoyed. It was unbelievable. My mentality has enhanced the element of surprise. I thanked God for how he gave me the chance to get into the finals.

So that is how my theory goes. Do not expect too much, nor feel an ultimate sense of hopelessness. This is why we should know how to balance between encouragement and pragmatism before judging the outcome.

Causing Controversy

The octopus has gotten it right again. I have agreed with Paul until the Germany-Spain match. Being an avid German team supporter, I was obviously hoping that Paul would be proved wrong for once. However, I was obviously beaten by that sotong. Paul only became famous after he correctly predicted the Germany-England match, and by then I was hoping that he would be rooting for Germany all the way.

There have been many reactions to this creature's accuracy in his prediction. I definitely did not believe that he had "psychic powers" or anything like it, only by pure coincidence. I was not particularly angry with the octopus, but joked that I would eat the sotong sashimi after the world cup. However, many others have taken the octopus' predictions personally. They realised that the octopus was spoiling the fun of anticipation, and his predictions may have a demoralising effect on the supposed losing team. There are even recipes to cook the octopus after the world cup. Haha, I thought. What a waste of time for people to be so angry because of football. This octopus has caused a stir among the football fans, and some hope that these sources of predictions would stop. For me, I do not mind controversy, and I was very happy when Sepp Blatter did not introduce the goal line technology. I still hope that he does not.

The octopus has predicted that Spain would win the world cup. I would be rooting for Netherlands. It seems like Paul is turning the tide against me now.

Redefining Youth Day

It has been a long weekend, with the heavy workloads which spoilt my world cup fever weekend. I have been struggling to complete my Projects' Day website and also with NSCC lurking around the corner, coupled with two tests in the week ahead, and representing Singapore in the coming WALA track competition, it is not difficult to feel stressed. As a student, I definitely expected this sort of sudden piles of workload ahead of me. However, this is the first time I have experienced such extreme amount of work being piled ahead of me.

This "fateful" event somehow coincides with youth day and also with the world cup fever. I was fully hoping that I would have enough time to catch this once every 4 years event, but obviously I did not have the luxury of watching an entire match. I believe that this is the result of a competitive environment, where everyone is competing to find his own significance to others. There is nothing wrong with that, but I do not think it is right to fight to be the best for the sake of glorifying yourself. Youth day was more like rushing to get work completed, no time to be youthful.

Anyway, I think you might be wanting to know what my solution to this problem is. I have decided to postpone youth day, which would fall on this Sunday, which would coincide with the world cup finals. However, I began thinking about my "plight". I believe everyone is experiencing just as much stress as I am, maybe even more. It does not matter whether it is youth day. Youth day has become more like another holiday to catch up with work. Stress becomes a sense of belonging to a teenager. Stress keeps up with people. People keep up with stress. It is impossible to break this cycle. Hence, I decide that it would be a better resort to manage your time and taking short breaks in any way you like. This is the only way how stress can be conquered.

The society has redefined what youth day is to many people. Do you accept this form of redefinition?

I have always had the habit of cleaning myself after training before boarding the bus, so that I would not be a source of discomfort for others. But if I really have no time to do so, I prefer to stand up rather than sit so that I would not leave my perspiration on the seat.

I was with my friend just now, and we were about to board the bus right after training. I did not clean myself up, so I was still perspiring when we were boarded the bus. As usual, I did not take a seat. When my friend asked me for the rationale of my actions, I explained it to him. However, he did not accept it. He simply said, "There is no such rule". Honestly, I reflected on my actions and I was actually quite convinced by his reply. It is true but there is no such rule that people who are dirty should not board public transport. But I thought again: Do our actions always have to be driven by rules?

I have always had this idea in my head: Follow the rules, and nothing wrong will happen to you. It has worked well, because I believe people with authority constructed rules with a reason: For people to follow. Being law abiding will not land you in trouble. However, I find being law abiding is not always the perfect way of living. I believe that we other than following the rules, it is important that we be at peace with others. This may not always be the best way to all situations, but I think that if we do not want to be someone who is known for doing the right things just for others to see and applaud, we have to start learning to consider the convenience of others and have a clear conscience at the same time.

The HBO miniseries of Band of Brothers was fantastic. To be honest, I was not all that hyped up about war films when we started out in class, but when I watched the first episode, I could not stop watching the rest. It deeply portrays the cruelty of war and but also brings out people who have leadership potential in the film, especially Major Richard Winters. I have actually bought the whole series, and I think I have already watched it twice over. Amongst all the shooting and the running and the bombing, valuable lessons can be learnt and I would like to share my thoughts about certain quotes in the show.

Firstly, there was a soldier, named Albert Blithe, who was deeply traumatised during his land on Normandy beach, and was afraid to face the enemy. His commander, lieutenant Speirs, told him that in order for him to be a good soldier, he had to have the "hope that he was already dead", then he would fight selflessly against the enemy "without compassion, without mercy, ...". I believe that during war, people are forced to lose their identity as a compassionate person, and would have to carry the burder of fighting their own human kind. I feel pity for Albert Blithe, but I believe that soldiers really have to prepare themselves mentally for warfare.

Secondly, Major Richard Winters, who is known as a hero of war, rejected the praises of others when they called him a hero. Instead, he humbly recalled an incident where his grandson asked him, "Grandpa, were you a hero of war?" Major Winters replied," No, but I served in a company of heroes". I admire his attitude and how he credits the effort of others for the success of the European Campaign. In fact, the soldiers in war would be heroes for fighting for their country.

Now, it is time for me to watch Saving Private Ryan

This is a picture of the 504th Parachute Infantry Regiment, where Steve Carlsen, the poet for we slept with our boots on, worked in. He deployed to Kosovo in November 2001 as part of peace keeping operations. He Deployed to Afghanistan in of December 2002 where he participated in combat operations. He was honorably discharged from the Army in 2003 due to a life long injury. He currently attends Southwestern Michigan College where his professor, Dr Michael Collins challenged him to write about his past experiences, which was why he was inspired to write the poem. The regiment was created in 1942 in the Army of the United States, and his job as a parachute soldier was to take part in land operations to restore order in the countries in need. One of the battalion's operations was operation uphold democracy, Haiti 1994. The battalion was also known as the Red Devils. One of Steve Carlsen's other poems include Take your Pills.

In the poem We slept with our boots on, it was written in the point of view of a soldier, as it is evident from how he describes that his "heart is pumping adrenaline all through my veins" and how he always uses the pronoun "we", where all the soldiers were feeling the same during the intense moments of the operations. He offers a religious tone in the poem, by how he acknowledges that he would soon be punished for his misdeeds which included handling a gun and killing people. This is evident from how he believes that he would meet Saint Peter when he dies. The poem is fast paced until the end, where he believed that he his career as a soldier was over, which is similar to how he had a near death experience. This portrayal is relevant to all soldiers, and hence the poem is in the point of view of all soldiers. In writting the poem in his point of view, it gives readers an idea of how a war is fought and the tiredness and fear when the soldiers were resting. Through his point of view, I feel that he is very direct in his approach of telling us his experiences.

The situation in the poem is during a landing operation. This is evident from how he says "Bullets are flying, the LZ is hot". The LZ stands for Landing Zone, and he knows that it was another dangerous operation and he needed to be quick and agile to dodge the bullets. The poet uses many different settings in the poem, from how he says that he fought from mountains to valleys, from house to caves to cars to creeks. The climax of the poem is during his fights with the enemy, where he kept pulling the trigger and reloaded repeatedly. It is an intense moment where we are unsure when he would be the one who is shot. The resolution to the conflict is when he escapes and goes to safety near the mountains at the Hindu Kush. If the conflict was not resolved, he would not have told us how he had to sleep with his boots on and the fear the soldiers were experiencing even when they were asleep.

The Language of the poem is simple but fast paced, coupled with a few strong words to increase the momentum of the poem. This is evident from how he uses military language like Lock N Load, which refers to weapons, and how he had no time to descibe the equipments and substituted it with "s***". Also, words like "yelled", "tremendous" and "adrenaline" to describe the chaos and fast paced scene in a war. He uses the poppy as a symbol of death, where he believes that his deathbed would be at a place of "tears" and "mud", which refers to war. Also, he uses metaphors when he said that "Beauty and terror are a strong mixed drink". This tells us that while he admire the scenery of where he was camping at i.e. Hindu Kush, terror also overwhelmed him inside. Also, he said that he "drank it like drunkards and had no time to think", which tells us that he could not risk his sleep to think about all the dangers and beauties which surrounded him. The simplicity of the poem helps to give readers a vivid portrayal of war, and the use of figurative language to describe his feelings is effective in portraying the common among the soldiers at war.

The poem makes me feel pity for the individual soldiers and their mothers, as the truth of the war really creeps me towards the end. It is really heartbreaking that the soldiers lose their innocence due to war, and how many people would be going up to see Saint Peter. Also, what hit me the hardest on the head was how the soldiers would sleep in constant fear of being sprung by the enemy during a surprise attack. However, the one thing good about war is that there is a sense of brotherhood, where unity is key in success, as how the poet says that "Blood is thicker than water, well but lead is thicker than blood", which tells us that they were all bonded together with the bullets and weaponary they were carrying, which was to become part of themselves. I believe that the reality of the poem is without question, as it could have happened less than 10 years ago. I am able to relate to what the poet sees through his eyes when writing the poem. This poem makes me feel a little more pessimistic about human nature because we realise that all the fear and intensity in the poem is because we are fighting against our own kind.

I have just finished reading That was Then, This is Now by S.E. Hinton. It is about two juvenile delinquents, Bryon and Mark, who were best friends from young and they started to grow apart as they got older. After several incidents, like the killing of one of their friends, Charlie, a bartender, made them changed their views. Also, with Bryon's girlfriends' brother going missing, Bryon starts spending more time searching for her brother than with Mark. This was when he discovered a shocking discovery about Mark. You may wish to read the whole book to discover the ending.

This book which was written in 1967, still seems very true to us, even if gang fights are not common in Singapore. There may be social segregation because of different social status. Also, because the poor people in society are left out, they turn out to crminial acts to obtain money. This book talks about friendship, priorities and growing up, which will definitely leave a lasting impression on your memory. Overall, this is a highly recommended book by me because you can really see the darkness and loneliness of a segregated society through the eyes of a gangster.